Cheers.

My parents pulled away eighteen minutes ago.  Throughout the summer, I thought about this moment a lot.  I thought about what it would feel like.  I thought I would feel utterly abandoned.  It was that forsaken feeling that terrified me.  

But I don't.  I'm still trying to swallow past the lump in my throat, and my eyelashes still cradle tears, but I'm feeling ok.

I was walking from my car back to my dorm, and I just looked at it.  I looked at the building I was going to call home for a year and the campus that was going to become mine.

I'm excited.

BYU is familiar enough to have some good memories, but foreign enough to feel like I'm starting over.  Anne's shadow is flitting here and there, just like at Sky View.  I still remember I was sitting in debate class, terrified.  I look over, and there were past pictures of the team.  And I saw a great picture of Anne, she looked beautiful.  She was smiling back at me in her blue and white shirt with the most engaging, kind smile.  And I knew that she was looking out for me.  I wish I had asked to keep that picture of her, no doubt I was too terrified as a novice, but it was beautiful.  Although there aren't any pictures of her in my dorm room, I still know she's looking out for me in Virginia at Anne Camp.

I didn't expect this new beginning to feel so ok, but it does.  This is the next step, and I suppose that that is going what should happen.  I do know that my feeling of peace is a heavenly gift, one I will thank the Heavens for tonight.

In my new dorm room.

Cheers to everyone starting over.  Deep breath in. Let's rock it.

xo. Elise

P.S. Barely walking, thanks for asking.  Legs are about as stiff as boards.