Sitting and Reading.

I have a confession.  I sat yesterday and just read and ate.  That's it.  That is all I did.  I basically read and waited around until it was appropriate for me to eat again.

And let me tell you, it was perfect.

My sister and I were talking about it.  My family leads incredibly busy lives.  I sometimes wonder why we do.  My parents both have busy jobs, my sister is working two jobs during her summer, and during the school year it seemed like I was signed up for every extracurricular possible.  To be honest, it's really difficult for us to relax.  As in, it takes a couple days for us to get it to work.

But yesterday?  It was so good.  I didn't feel any pressure to do anything, for once.  I didn't run (even though I was supposed to).  I didn't clean (even though I could have done a lot.  Ok, I did do the dishes).  I didn't try to learn another language or start a charity.  I just sat and read.  I checked out a lot of classics, but to be honest I just read two romance novels.  And it was perfect.

This summer has been really difficult for me.  I don't have much going on, and apparently you need experience to get a job that requires no experience.  I'm in a weird transition and I don't have a defined 'I am' statement anymore.  Yeah, I registered for college (that was a weird experience), but I'm not in high school anymore.  I'm not in college.  I don't have a defined role.  I have to rework my identity.

Also, graduating from high school made me feel much older than any of my birthdays did.  Suddenly I can say, "when I was in high school," and it's a legitimate statement.  This summer seems like a never ending stretch of hot days with an irregular schedule.  Because I used to be in high school.

Anyway, maybe I'll run and clean today.  We'll see. ;)

xo. Elise