All the things.

We have a cute little neighbor who constantly talks about all the things.  All the boys.  All the clothes.  All the fun.  And I feel like all the things is an accurate description for life these days. 

It's been a while since I've felt like writing here.  Sometimes I am so exhausted of constantly trying, smiling, cleaning, talking, writing, organizing, all of it.  It is a lot of work to be human, and sometimes it just takes everything to get to bed.  Not even at a decent hour, just in bed at all.  

But I am feeling better today.  I woke up feeling slightly foggy.  Rain is romantic when you don't have to walk in it.  No sun seems like a good idea in the heat of the July.  My outfit reminded me of my junior year, completely overdone and uninspired.  It wasn't even that bad, but it was another manifestation of how my creativity is lacking.  

And then I realized that I am tired of giving away my power.  I am tired of letting other people determine how I feel.  I am tired of allowing my fears get the best of me.  I'm tired of constantly living up to other people's expectations.  I have so many things that are completely in my control, yet I am fettering away my power to other people.  Why?  It's a syndrome of people pleasing and tightrope walking, neither of which I'm ok with.  

So I decided that I am going to take it back.  I don't need to dodge places, feelings, and people because I'm scared.  I don't have to around and constantly compare.  I'm ok.  

So tomorrow.  Tomorrow I'm taking it back. I am tired of giving away my power.  

Cheers to a new Tuesday! 

xo. Elise