College Round 2

I start school again on Monday, something I keep forgetting about.  I have been here for a week and a half and sitting in my bedroom feels normal.  I made it through NSO and successfully played the part.    I've already made a hilarious amount of mistakes and missteps in the various areas of my life i.e. driving to Target and Walmart to find a calculator that was actually in the BYU bookstore the whole time.  While participating in my first bidding war over a parking spot.  It's funny...I somehow feel like I made $130...instead of just having it sit in my bank account earning minimal interest.

I'm sitting in my cream chair that has followed me for the past few years.  I'm wearing the shirt and shorts I have all summer because creativity is zapped.  I went through and organized and cleaned my closet and life.  I worked a lot today, and somehow I think these next few weeks will probably make me feel the most crazy and the most alive I have for a really long time.  I'm reaching that point in my life where I am getting space from who I term "High School Elise," but I'm not sure how far off the mark I actually was when I was 17.  (I would say 18 too, but since I'm only 19 that sounds a little weird).

I'm excited to start round two again.  There is a part that is terrifying, and I sometimes catch myself dreaming of the dorm that was comfortable and the friends that I can't talk to anymore.  I'm getting more and more comfortable saying goodbye and there is something comforting about just letting it fall through my fingers.

I was reviewing my emails, and I just had a wash of gratitude.  God does live.  And He does love me. And He has been proving that to me since day 1.  I will continue to search for and forget the signs, but I will take this moment of clarity and run with it until April.

For the record, he was really sweaty and smelled like it.  But hey, Cosmo!  P.S.  My hair has been killing it for the past two days, but just you wait, tomorrow it will fall flat for Cute Sunday.  

xo. Elise