All this future

I was walking back from mailbox today and was overwhelmed with memories from the past three years of this place.  Alesha and I decided on this complex because of the proximity to campus, washer and dryer situation, and natural light (not even kidding).  I want to cry when I think about leaving because this place has seen the happiest and most dire emotions. 

Everything is changing these days.  In the past few years, I have felt that consistently--each year it seems like nothing has remained the same.  Sometimes it is overwhelming and sometimes it is actually really great.  Happy changes, like Anne getting married, Mom moving to BYU, Dad getting a raise/working on a positive shift in career paths. 

And some changes are harder, like Grandma dying, health challenges, friends moving on, feeling hurt by rejection on many levels. 

I'm feeling a little lost these days, or maybe it's just today, when I think about the touchstones in my life.  I feel like I've known who I am for so long, my path is linear and ambitious, yet these days it feels more like a blank page. 

Blank pages are exciting, and another day I will wax poetic about the greatness associated with that.  Today it is mostly overwhelming and exhausting. 

Things are fine, good actually.  So many good things, but wow, sometimes it is overwhelming.

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